Thursday, May 31, 2012

Look what I got today

Today I received a HUGE box from the nice UPS man. Ziggy actually intercepted the box and carried it in for me. He said WOW MOM, that's a big box. He's so sweet. But today the box that arrived is just another step in the process of baby carrying. It's full of medication. Ridiculous amount of medication.

Yeah that is a lot of medication that I will be using to get through this journey. It actually made me sick looking at it all. The sheets of needles and syringes increased the nausea feeling that overwhelmed me. I'll be honest here, I am not the best receiver of shots.

 OK, so when I was standing in that awful line while in basic training, just seeing the airman with injectors that looked like guns made me nervous, sick and weak in the knees. The first shot I almost hit the floor, but by the third one I could not put one foot in front of the other one and had to be carried to the seats below before I hit the ground. I get light-headed, dizzy, nauseous and don't feel well for about thirty minutes. This does not bod well for the upcoming weeks.

So, I'm hoping that the first injections that I must give myself in my abdomen are not going to be that bad. They are supposed to be smaller, diabetic needles.  I have exactly 11 days to come to terms with the fact that I will receive 16 weeks of these injections daily. That's 112 shots. Oh My Word, maybe I like the number 16 better. I think I have gone insane. Yep, maybe, probably, most likely, no most definitely, I have gone crazy to think these shots are going to be no problem. Well, I'll adjust. If not then we'll just have to give them when I have an hour to lay down. Maybe before bed. Not sure yet. But anyways this is an amazing process no less.

My family is beginning to make travel plans to the Northwest. We are so excited to get to meet the HP's. The kids are so excited to see Nana and Grandpa too. We also received some even better news today. Zeus is NOT deploying before next April. Yes, you read that right I almost did this journey alone. Thankfully God's hand is still at work. My God is an awesome God and knowing that I am sure giving myself these shots will be supported by God and he will give me the needed courage.
Please continue to pray for us through this process.

 I was told by Doctor the other day that we have an 81% chance of pregnancy and a 65% chance of twins. How amazing that would be to give my HP's not only a baby but two babies.

Stay tuned for more info.

Blessings Bloggie Buddies

Friday, May 25, 2012

My Dates

I got to talk with the Doctor today and she cleared me for medication. So you ask what that means? Well, starting June 11 I will be taking abdomen injections daily to prepare my womb for precious cargo. The injections will continue through 10 weeks of pregnancy. July 5 we ultrasound for lining check to make sure my uterine lining is plump and ready to receive that cargo.  My family and I will drive across the country after that for an embryo transfer target date of July 16. Yep, you are reading this right. I am getting pregnant on July 16. Man, I wish I was able to nail that day down when I got pregnant with my own sweet babies. But hey, after all my HP's have been through its OK to know that date this early. The process will begin shortly and I'm so busy with all the other events with my family that it will be here before I know it. Plus, I'm really excited about the thought that my babies get to see Nana and Grandpa and all their cousins this summer. Its nerve wracking, don't get me wrong. But I'm glad its happening.

What's funny, I tried to call Athena after my doctor call and her phone had died. It took me over 3 hours to get a hold of her and Apollo to share the news of our dates. Its really, really exciting. It shall make the weekend much more fulfilling for them I think.

Stay tuned as the updates keep blowing in.

Blessings on a relaxing holiday weekend and please remember all my brothers and sisters serving, and most importantly those we have lost to have this very freedom today. Happy Memorial Day.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The Ball Continues to Roll

Its been rollin' for awhile but with every new step we take it feels closer and closer that reality will have me pregnant by summer's end. Yesterday I got several test results on myself and everything was negative or normal. That was wonderful. You don't realize how many puzzle pieces have to come together to create a baby. But thankfully physically I am clean, clear, and signed off to carry a bundle or bundles of joy.

 Today the good news kept coming. Donor is clean and clear and she is set to give us some eggs in late June. So that leaves me to nail down a few dates for my travel to Pacific Northwest. We are scheduled to talk with the Doc later this week to determine what is a good date for us to complete the transfer. Its amazing how its coming together. Still not looking forward to the fast approaching date to begin daily injections. I think Zeus is secretly smiling thinking of the fact that he gets to stab me daily. For a reason of course.

 Later this week we are also scheduled to sign and complete the legal agreement as well. That has been an on going work in progress but it looks really close now.

 So there are still many steps yet to do but each one feels great when we turn around and look back and see all the steps we have taken. Right now, My brain feels like I am living a dream. Time is moving ever so slow and the details are fading or have become less important. I'm not sure how to explain it, it just feels different almost like an out of body experience, sort of. I know Athena and I both wish we could wave a wand and poof I am in the eighth month, hahahaha. Its not that easy. But it is so comforting that my HP's are so comfortable with me. I love being able to chat on the phone, text silly pictures together or just talk life. Apollo and Athena already feel like siblings, friends or long lost cousins. They are so excited and I love hearing and experiencing that excitement with them.
 So I ask all you wonderful readers to continue praying for smooth ride to the finish line as we near the starting tape. The ball rolls and it rolls further and further each day.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

God, I'm Listening this time

Welcome to my new blog friends!

Today I begin sharing the journey I've been walking about 2 months now. Let me go back and share from the beginning.

About 2 months ago, early April to be exact Zeus, my husband, received an email that will forever change our lives. The email was an adoption update from a long time friend of Zeus. The email asked where we were in our lives and if I was still interested in becoming a surrogate. This jump back a bit and I'll fill you in a little more.

 Most people know that I've had surrogacy on my mind for over 4 years now. But I never had much motivation to find someone and when I did those people were not interested or had something else going on in there life. But as time has gone by God has continued to put little clues out there reminding me that he wanted me to do this. Several times I ignored him or I just brushed him aside. Not this time. I decided to listen. I see the signs, I hear the voice and now I have chosen to walk the walk, one step at a time. Left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot.

So Zeus replied to the email and shared that he felt we needed to talk "face to face" via skype. We set a time up that worked for both families. During the passing days Zeus and I talked through every aspect of the process. Feelings, cost, sacrifices, family support, intentions, effects on our children and every other thing you can think of when jumping into a serious situation. The day came for our skype and the both of us were nervous wrecks. We had never met the wife before. Sure we researched every piece and lead we could find about this couple. Google can really be your best friend if you just use it. We weren't sure how this "meeting" was going to go. But we left it in Gods hands. Through fear and loads of sweat we sat on the couch side by side in support of each other.The meeting ended up with us saying YES. Yes, we were willing to begin the surrogacy process and see how far it would take us. Yes, we wanted to help a couple have their own family. Yes, we were willing to share our time with another family. Yes, if we were faced with the same terrible news we would want someone to do the same thing for us. Plain and simple.

So there it was. We had just listened to God and we felt relieved but we were more scared than anything. I couldn't stop thinking of all the things that could come up along the way. But I put my focus on the positive, faith in the Lord and I made 2 phone calls. The first to my Mom and the second to Zeus' Mom. We wanted to run it by them, ask their opinion and let them know we needed their support, 100%. Both Moms were 100% for our decision. Whew! What a huge relief. That support was worth no amount of money. I cried, I'll be honest. It was emotional. At that point we knew God was in control and would guide us through this process every. single. step.

So there you have it. By the Grace of God and the love in our hearts we have begun the long, bumpy, fulfilling journey of Surrogacy aka Gestational Carrier.

Step inside and follow us along on the journey of extreme emotions on this amazing, God controlled, roller coaster.

 I'm not the Momma, just the belly!!!!