Thursday, June 28, 2012

3rd Times A Charm

After my last ultrasound I got to start taking estradiol patches. I have a really strict schedule of when to put it on and when to change it or add more. This week I am on my 3rd set of patches. I'm on 2 patches for 2 days. Then I'll go to three and then four before we do the transfer. But that comes later, right now this experienced, stretch marked, flabby belly of mine has 3 sets of patch marks. It's kinda funny now that I have those and needle entry marks and a few bruises to add to the beauty this belly is seriously taking a beating before ever having babies kick me, LOL. Anyways, there's two pictures here, can you tell which one is the patches vs which one is just the residue. I think it's funny, you might not but it's just another step towards making this couple a family. I never dreamed that there would be this much preparation for a comfy home but geez was I ever surprised.

The third set of patches has actually been much better than the first two, today I have zero symptoms. No headaches, no sore scalp, no itchiness, well not sure about weight gain but that's been an ongoing fight with all these meds. Not overly worried since I am about to need that weight for the precious cargo that will soon be on board. Trying to maintain my excitement and squash my expectations since my HPs will definitely be thinking differently than I but I'm hopeful we get the outcome we hope for the first shot, haha or 200th shot!!!!! I crack myself up, get it all the shots I'm taking. Ok, so maybe you don't. I must lonely or something with Zeus having been gone all week. Anyways, that's the latest update from my world. I'll try to share more soon. Just keep those prayers coming.

Monday, June 25, 2012

Another step complete

Wow, when we started this process I did not think it would have ever taken this long. But today I never imagined us actually getting to this point. It's been a long road and we aren't even pregnant yet. I'm anxious every time we reach a milestone.

Today we received fantastic news. We have frozen embryos and more than any of us anticipated. It's awesome. We have enough to do this process several times. Thank you Lord above. It's so cool to know our embryos are simply waiting on me now. Actually puts the pressure on much heavier than before. . I'm working hard not to miss a dose of my meds and to follow all of my instructions to a t. We are now less than a month away from a pregnancy. I've started searching out maternity clothes. I actually bought 2 dresses that were on sale and then added a coupon so I got 2 brand new cute dresses for $18. They will be perfect for my dress loving , expanding body. Now for garage sales, thrift stores and loaners.

We are officially one more step complete. Keep the prayers coming folks we need them, all of them we can get.

Blessings bloggie buddies

Friday, June 22, 2012

Hold on....

Today I had another ultrasound to measure the lining once again since it was too thick on Wednesday. I was so nervous this morning headed to the office. My 40 mile drive was much easier today versus the 90minute drive on Wednesday. Once I arrived I had to wait awhile for the room to clear. That did not help my nervousness one bit.

We get in and she's taking pictures and I measure at a 7. She seems pleased with the result. I'm trying everything not to crawl off the table because it hurt so bad. Really would not recommend a vaginal ultrasound twice in one week. Oh man, I might not be able to make myself pee the next few days. Ouch!!!

So the fertility clinic called and said lining is still too thick, it absolutely needs to be at a 5. That figures, leave it to my body to hold on to everything baby. Seriously!!! So she says we have to wait one more day before Lupron can be reduced and patches can be started. This will delay things by one day as of now. Next ultrasound is now moved to July 6. I'm bummed and a bit sad that I am now holding things up.

So it looks like Saturday is the day we get to mix it up a bit and add some crazy hormones. Hoping Zeus and babies remain patient and loving as I have no idea how these new meds will affect me or my mood.

Say a prayer that things stay on target without too many more hiccups. Say a prayer that Apollo does well in his triathlon this weekend. Say a prayer that the meds don't take me for too big of a ride.

Hold on to your hats, we're in for a bit of a roller coaster ride.

Blessings

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

We have embryos!!!!

Today was another milestone day in the journey to familyhood. Donor eggs were successfully retrieved with 13 of the 18 successfully fertilized. We are so very excited about this. Now they grow for 6 days to become blastocysts before being cryopreserved awaiting my arrival. So I know Athena and Apollo have got to be elated, cautiously optimistic.

As far as my progress goes,
I had an ultrasound this morning and had my estradiol levels checked. The lining in my uterus was determined to be too thick (12mm) and needs to be 5mm. So we need mother nature to kick in and release some of that extra lining. Thankfully the ultrasound kicked that into gear, TMI, so sorry. Prepare for the details folks. Anyways I must go back on Friday morning for another ultrasound to see if my lining levels have come down. Once that happens we can reduce my Lupron dosage by half and start estrogen patches. Estradiol levels were just right so that was very good news, meaning meds are working and body is accepting them.

We are still on target so keep the prayers coming that at least 4 embryos make it blastocyst stage on Monday. Also pray that my body reduces the lining and allows us to keep moving forward.

Blessings Bloggie Buddies

Monday, June 18, 2012

Pin cushion

A few days ago Athena decided she wanted my nickname to be pin cushion. If you ask why then you must not have read that I have to receive daily injections for about 4 months. Its fitting, thats for sure. So, she texted me the other day and said "hey PC". I fell off the bed laughing so hard. It truly was funny, or so I thought. Thanks Athena!!

Last night I discovered that each of the injection sites are beginning to bruise, ugly green bruises. I now look more like a punching bag than a pin cushion. My injections are coming along though and I'm getting a little better each day at dispensing the medicine without reading 3 pages of directions which I had been doing the last several days. Zeus has yet to give me an injection, I've had the courage to continue them myself since he came home. Woo hoo, for now.

On another note I'm looking for maternity clothes. Since my youngest is 6 1/2 yr old and we had completed our family I shared mine with others and am starting from scratch all over again. So if you have some laying around or know a friend/neighbor I'm more than willing to accept used clothing in size large and extra large. I blow up quickly once pregnant so I will need them fairly soon. I do not want to have to buy all new as that will get expensive. Never done a full
Winter pregnancy, so this should be different. Please help if you can!!!!

Update:
Birth control pills were completed on Friday and we are now waiting on mother nature to arrive any day. Wednesday we go for ultrasound and bloodwork and we will add estrogen patches to the daily med regimen then as well. I hear we have egg retrieval from our donor that day as well. Athena might have a phone glued to her face all day with all the excitement.

Today I've been sick to my stomach since about 3pm, not a good sign. Zeus needs a nastigram since he is less than helpful and lacks any sympathy.

Thanks for your continued prayers for my upcoming pregnancy, my hopeful parents patience, strength and courage and for safe travels.

Off to Santa Clause Indiana for a few days with my babies for outstanding report cards. I'll write when we return

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Injection day 3

Alright friends yesterdays injection by far has been the worst shot I've had to give myself ever. It was pure misery, and I do not say that lightly. The shot yesterday laid me out. As soon as the needle touched my skin it hurt like the dickens and it was all downhill from there. I immediately got sick to my stomach, thinking that vomiting would actually make me feel better. By the time I got the cap on the needle and put it in the needle disposal box the room was spinning. I started seeing spots and the color from my skin disappeared. I was lightheaded, dizzy, nauseous and not feeling well at all. I laid down as fast as I could so I didn't pass out. It took almost 2 hours before my tummy settled down.

I was determined that today's shot was going to be nothing like last nights. It was dreadful. I decided to try my best to relax and I put an ice block on my stomach for about 5 minutes. Once I couldn't feel the ice anymore, it didn't feel cold, I thought it would be OK to give myself the shot. I prepared everything and cleaned my tummy where the injection site would be and stood there trying my best not to think about it. Took the needle and stuck myself, shockingly surprised that I did not feel a thing. OH Happy Day. This is fantastic. I did not hurt, I did not get sick, I did not get dizzy and there was no tummy ache. Thank you Lord above. I have found the new recipe for self injections. So here I stand on day 3 thinking much more positively than ever before. These Lupron injections are going to be manageable. Thankfully. Now if we could make the Progesterone injections this manageable we will be in good shape.

So I leave you will warm fuzzies for today. Thanks to all of you bloggie buddies out there for your prayers. They are making a huge difference. I hope you continue to follow my journey and pray for both families as we put one foot in front of the other each and every day.

Blessings to all of you.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Day 1, and we are off and running or stabbing

Well silent readers, today is the day that the 4 of us have looked forward to for a long time. The day meds were started. I've really avoided the topic most the day other than when my dear Mother in Law called to check and see how it went. But I didn't have much to share with her, since I'm waiting til evening time to take the meds. Now I do.

Are you guys all wondering how it went? I bet you are. But I have something I want to ask of each of you, first.

 I really do look forward to hearing from or reading your thoughts. So please leave me comments at the bottom of each blog topic. I have no idea who's following my story and I shouldn't worry about it but it is nice to know your thoughts too.

So tonight I was rather freaked out when I got all the papers, materials, needles, boxes and etc. all laid out. I must say I have never really been fully interested in all this medical stuff. So I never have paid attention when someone drew medicine from a vial into a needle. Why the heck would I need to know that? That was dumb, because today I needed to know how to do that.

While all the babies were watching movies in their rooms I prepared myself for this medical procedure. Zeus is out of town for the week so I could not rely on him to do it for me. I had to gain the strength to do this myself. Glory to God for this strength.


So here is the medicine, needle and the alcohol to clean both the meds and my tummy.

Cap off now and ready to wipe clean with the alcohol

Now the needle is ready to dispense the medicine

All set, Now to clean my tummy with the alcohol

Here I go, giving  myself the very first injection of this journey, my first surrogacy journey.


OUCH, Holy Toledo that hurt. I have no clue what people say that doesn't hurt. YIKES. The best part is that I did not get dizzy, no lightheadedness, no tummy ache. That is the first time ever for me. However I think I sweat for about 30 minutes afterwards.

Now, I have never taken hormones other than a few weeks of birth control pills. So, I have no idea how my body or mind will react to this medication. Should Zeus and the babies be scared, I don't know. I just hope that the daily injections don't make me go haywire. I'll apologize in advance for any wild emotional behavior. Just blame it on the medication.

Today I made it. I did something I never thought I'd ever be able to do. I gave myself the first injection of medication. I am now one more day closer to the goal of a pregnancy.

Say a little prayer that tomorrows injection goes as well as today. Say a prayer that my HP's hearts will be opened to the vulnerabilities that we parents experience through this journey. Say a prayer that Zeus travels safely home after his week in Ohio. Say a prayer that I will not have negative reactions to the medication. Leave me a comment!!!

Blessings and we are off and running or stabbing.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

SIGNED. SEALED. DELIVERED.

Oh my goodness today has finally turned out to be a HUGE, and I mean HUGE relief.

Yesterday, well that day needs to just be erased from history. It was the worst day we have had throughout this whole process. I won't go into detail just know we were bantering back and forth with lawyers to finalize the contract. I think I cried more than I have in years. Puking, nausea, and sadness  were all experienced yesterday. Ewwwww, just not something I ever want to deal with again. So glad my eyes were not swollen shut today, just puffy.

Thankfully today is a new day. A sunny, warm, happy and tummy calmed day. A day with smiles. A day with positive communication. A day planning future trips. A day seeing Insurance Agents. A day of peace. A day of milestones.

 I woke up to a phone call from the lawyer. She is quick, which is amazing.  She had heard from the other lawyer and all was well with the legal agreement and we were set to sign. After receiving our copy in the late afternoon I ran, OK maybe drove but you get my drift,  to Zeus' work so we could have two, neutral, of age adults witness our signing and then sign as well. Nothing like telling someone 2 minutes before they are to sign something about our impending journey. Zeus has a way of doing that. HAHAHA. We found two gracious characters to help us complete our portion. Then we had to scan, attach and email it back to the lawyer. Many other copies will be sent through mail.

So happy we are done with that part of this journey. If anyone wants or is interested in ever starting their own journey I must say that this has got to be the hardest part thus far. But, with patience, love and loads more of love we are officially, legally bound to this journey. It's weird to finally be done with this MAJOR and I mean major step of the process. I never imagined finally making it this far. I am so thankful for all the prayers and for Gods hand in all this.

Today we are now mere days from starting the next big step. Medication, OK maybe not so much medication as INJECTIONS. Yikes, I'm a bit nervous as I will start while Zeus is in Ohio. But it's only 7 days right. I mean all I have to do is give myself 7 shots without him, should be no big deal right? NOT!!! Maybe I should teach my 11 yr old how to administer these. Ok, Ok, Ok not the brightest idea I've ever had but it sure sounds better than having to do it myself, doesn't it.  Man, I'm not sure how surrogates do this without a partner to support them and love them and ultimately stab them with a needle everyday. Oh well, he will be home very soon after that and then he can assume his husbandly duties of administering these ugly shots to his fragile wife. Stop laughing, I am fragile. OK, so maybe not, just don't tell him that. He's been AWESOME every step of the way. Especially yesterday, he was like Honey, my nickname, its no big deal, all will get worked out and life will go on while he sat in his office chair shrugging his shoulders without any sign of concern while I sat bawling my eyes out. Such a loving, comedian I live with and somehow love. After all that. It was a good day.

 We are finally SIGNED.SEALED. DELIVERED.